Your performance in bed affects your self-confidence, so you cannot risk mediocrity. Moreover, you want to satisfy the woman you are with, to make sure she won’t forget the experience but come craving for more. And yet, research shows that quite a few women fake their orgasms.
How do you rock her world and eliminate doubt? The secret is getting her aroused, before and during intercourse. Believe it or not, it is not that difficult. We will cover how you can do that in the following lines. But, before we get there, let’s review the basics of women’s orgasms.
Brief Introduction to Women’s Orgasms and What to Keep in Mind
Orgasm is the climax of sexual excitement, a simultaneous explosion of pleasure and a discharge of accumulated erotic tension. This means that, in order to drive your partner to orgasm, you need to ensure three key ingredients:
Sexual excitement
Pleasure
Erotic tension
Women can experience several types of orgasms:
Clitoral – These are mostly surface orgasms that feel like a tingling along her skin and in her brain. The key to inducing them is to stimulate the clitoris.
Vaginal – These are deeper experiences that you can induce through penetration and stimulation of her G-spot. You can actually feel when they happen, as her vagina pulses.
Combo – This type of orgasm will literally rock her world. It basically means getting her to experience a vaginal and clitoral orgasm at the same time, by stimulating her G-spot and her clitoris simultaneously.
Erogenous zones – If you manage to find her most erogenous areas, stimulating those could help you drive her to a less intense but still pleasurable experience. Think nipples, ear lobes, neck, etc.
Anal – This type of orgasm is the most difficult to induce but also probably the most pleasurable for you. With patience and attention to her needs and responses, you can get her there.
Now you know a little more about your goals, and we’ve already established that her arousal is key to achieving them. Let’s see how you can achieve that!
5 Easy and Infallible Techniques for Her Ultimate Arousal
1. Foreplay Is a Must
A study carried out by a group of sexologists at the Kinsey Institute, USA, revealed that most women achieve orgasm after 10 to 20 minutes of sex. Unlike men who get most of their sexual gratification from the act itself, women get 80% of their sexual satisfaction from what happens before the act.
Therefore, don’t rush things! Take time and make those few minutes before the act, be all about her. Kiss her, hold her, caress her, press your body against her, and let her anticipate your needs and intentions. Make her feel beautiful and desired.
Even if it’s just a one-night stand, you want her open and ready for you, focused on the pleasure of both of you, not insecure, in doubt, or just playing along. If you manage to get her in the right mood, the rest will flow naturally, and she will leave all her worries and inhibitions aside.
2. Discover and Pay Attention to Her Erogenous Zones
If it means kissing or caressing her from head to toe, then so be it. You need to discover her sensitive spots, and explore them, stimulate them. While your mind probably focuses on breasts and genitals, her neck and ear lobes could get you even better results.
The easiest way to discover her erogenous zones and stimulate them with the best results is during a massage. If the situation allows it, offer it to her. A scented oil and some candles will help her relax and surrender herself to you. Getting out of your clothes will be easy, and her body will be all yours to explore.
Showers and bubble baths work miracles as well, especially when accompanied by a glass of fine wine. If you are at a party or in a public place, take advantage of every opportunity to touch her and press or rub your body against her. From holding her hand to caressing her foot under the table, running your fingers through her hair or holding her tight as you dance, anything can help you build anticipation and desire.
3. Don’t Rush Her Out of Her Clothes
While you’re probably eager to see her naked, wait for her to want it as well. Feeling your hands underneath her clothes, your bodies yearning for one another yet separated by garments will drive her crazy, and that’s what you want, isn’t it?
And as you take off her clothes, don’t forget to caress her, to pay attention to every part of her body that you expose. If you just undress her and get to action, you could ruin the moment and lose her. You want your bodies naked and aligned, and you want her begging or praying that you take her.
4. Lubricants Are Your Best Friends
No matter how soft your skin is, hers is softer. She needs a soft touch; she needs to feel your skin sliding on hers. Body lotions, massage oils, and lubricants are your best friends. You should use them, not just during the act itself, but before as well.
5. Choose Your Positions Carefully and Stimulate More Than One Area at the Same Time
It will be up to you to find out what position she prefers. For starters, try intuitive positions that allow her some control. She knows better what she likes, and she can show it to you if you allow her. Also, make sure the position you choose exposes her body to you.
During intercourse, you want to be able to kiss her and caress her, to stimulate the other erogenous zones on her body as well, not just her genitals. Let her on top, or start from the missionary position and play with angles, depth, and other details until you feel her responses and make her lose control and surrender to pleasure.
Final Advice for Her Arousal and Ultimate Pleasure
Unfortunately, there is no universal technique to arouse and pleasure women. However, by combining the five suggestions above with passion and enthusiasm, you cannot fail. Just remember to be gentle but determined to follow her responses and act accordingly. The reward will be worth it!
Dani Fogel. is a Communication Coordinator at Brandable, based in Los Angeles, CA. She works on the Queen V brand within the company’s Digital and Ecommerce department.
Follow her on Twitter: @daniellefogel